


Esscence of Euphoria

by AkaShika



Series: Tumblr Prompts [8]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, How do I name things?, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Sirius Black Lives, Stream of Consciousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 18:10:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15491709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AkaShika/pseuds/AkaShika
Summary: It started the Christmas of her Sixth Year





	Esscence of Euphoria

**Author's Note:**

> This, I believe, was the beginning of the Start of Envy and Desire, (I posted this on Tumblr, Me and Meggie compared notes on stuff then we kind of didn't stop writing for five days). and because I was so entrenched in E&D, I forgot to put this here. Now, a Week later, I've remembered it existed and need to put it here before I bloody forget again.

It started the Christmas of her Sixth year. After the disaster that was the Department of Mysteries back in June, Harry refused to go back to the Dursley’s and Sirius pulled his head out of his arse and stopped drinking, something he told Lupin he probably should have done before if he’d wanted any hope of having Harry live with him.

Sirius had cleaned himself up and when Hermione joined him and Harry at Grimmauld Place for Christmas after telling Harry her parents were at a dental conference in America, she was surprised by the difference in them both.

She tried to be happy, because Harry was happy and he deserved that much at least, but at night, when she couldn’t sleep, she thought about her parents and how she wouldn’t be seeing them again for a long time. She knew that at some point, the Death Eaters would try to find them and kill them to get to her, to get to Harry, so she’d wiped their memories, wiped their knowledge of their daughter away, and had them move.

Even if she could restore their memories she doubted they’d forgive her that quickly. Memories made a person after all.

The night it started, she was in the library, trying to read but failing because of the tears swimming in her eyes when Sirius came in and sat next to her on the sofa.

The minute he saw she was crying he pulled her into his arms and held her, just held her as she poured out the grief she had for losing her parents, then she told him what she’d done. He rubbed his hand across her bare shoulders then down her back and up again. It was soothing.

She turned her head and pressed her lips against the skin at his throat and he froze. His hand was on her lower back, on top of the thin tank top she wore for bed, but the fabric felt flimsy beneath his touch and she could feel the heat of his hand as he left it there and looked at her.

“Hermione,” he said slowly and carefully. “Don’t do something you’ll regret. Don’t do anything that might hurt you more just because you’re hurting now.”

To say it started during the Christmas break of her Sixth year was probably a lie. Hermione had been feeling all sorts of different things for Sirius for over a year at that point. Whether it was the happiness she felt because her best friend had something to smile about now or the fear that Voldemort had him and was holding him hostage for Harry and the prophecy, or even the safe crush she’d had because he was an adult and he was good looking and there was no way he would think of her as anything more than his godson’s best mate.

Pressing her lips to his was euphoric and something she never thought would happen.

Then he growled low in his throat and pushed her down against the sofa and left her gasping for breath as he moved with experience that Hermione had yet to gain. His hands moved with surety and teased the hem of her top even as he looked at her with the unspoken question lingering in his eyes.

She felt sure that he, at least, (unlike McLaggen) would take her saying no properly and not try to force the issue.

She was right.

He nodded and let his lips descend to hers again, softer this time, without the promise of more to come but just for the enjoyment of it. She looped her hands around his neck and buried her fingers in his hair.

It could have been hours.

It could have been days.

She finally pulled back and looked at him.

His dark eyes looked hazy and his pupils were wide. Any other time and she would have said that he’d been drinking, but right now she knew he was only drunk on her.

“You should sleep,” he said, softly.

But as she rose to leave the room, he grabbed her hand in his own and pulled her back.

“This, whatever this is,” he said, unexpectedly serious. “It will only ever go as far as you want it to.” He pressed a kiss to the back of her hand and let her go.

When she was curled up in her own bed again, she realised what he meant. He was giving her an out. He was giving her control of everything and if she never wanted anything from him again, he would be ok with it.

That was the moment she wanted him more than ever.


End file.
